10 Funniest Golf Jokes
- A classic: Why do golfers always carry a spare pair of trousers with them? In case they get a hole in one.
- Greens OK?: A guy on vacation finishes his round, goes into the clubhouse. The head pro says, “did you have a good time...
Full Answer
What are some of the funniest jokes ever told?
Dec 12, 2021 · The first player stops, doffs his cap, and bows his head as the cortege passes. “That was a really nice thing to do,” the second golfer says. “It’s good to see there is still some respect in the world.”. “Well, it’s only right,” the first golfer replies. “I …
Can You Tell Me the funniest jokes ever?
Best golf jokes ever - Unijokes.com - 57 Golf jokes A husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the wife asked, "Honey, if I died would you get married again?" The husband said, "No sweetie." The woman said, "I'm sure you would." So the man said, "Okay, I would" Then the woman asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?"
What is the funnyest joke ever?
May 22, 2019 · Strap yourselves in – it's golf's funniest jokes. Best golf jokes: R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Four retired men play golf together once a week for many years. One day a funeral procession drives by the course. One ... Best golf jokes: Caddiesmack. Best golf jokes: Drink and drive. Best golf jokes: Clucking mad. ...
What is your funniest joke?
10 Funniest Golf Jokes A classic: Why do golfers always carry a spare pair of trousers with them? In case they get a hole in one. Greens OK?: A guy on vacation finishes his round, goes into the clubhouse. The head pro says, “did you have a good time...
How do you compliment a golfer?
Specific things. And the good news is that in golf that's actually pretty easy. “You're such a fantastic putter!” becomes “You work so hard on reading greens.” “You always hit your driver so well!” becomes “It's interesting that you took two practice swings before that drive.”Aug 17, 2020
What are some golf sayings?
19 Golf Phrases For Good LuckGood Luck.Enjoy The 19th Hole.Hit 'Em Long And Straight.May The Fores Be With You.Play Well.Swing Easy.Only Birdies.Have A Great Round.More items...•Nov 17, 2021
What is a good golf hit called?
An ace, commonly known as a hole-in-one, is the best score out there. When you get an ace, that means you get to write a “1” on the scorecard.
What do you say to someone who plays golf?
It may seem simple, but it absolutely works as a way to wish a golfer the best. Simply saying, “Good luck,” means that you hope the golfer plays well. This is a good thing to say even if you are playing a match against someone else.
What does Scooby mean in golf?
Staff picks: For golfers on the go “[The words] mean anything you want them to mean, really,” Wolff said. “Scooby's one of them, you could be like 'Hey, I'm going to get some Scooby snacks' or like 'What up, Scooby? ' describing someone.” Scooby, like the children's character, that seems normal enough, right?Dec 8, 2020
How is golf a metaphor for life?
You put yourself in a hole and it's, “Can I get up and down and still make bogey?” But that's how life is. Sometimes you don't control it. You don't control the negative things that happen. But you still have to overcome them.Apr 18, 2016
Why do golfers say sit?
Players yell 'bite' (or 'hold' or 'sit' or 'hit a house') when they want the ball to stop quickly. Most often used on an approach shot.Jan 28, 2011
What do you call a poor golfer?
"Duffer" is a colloquial or slang term within golf for a mediocre or poor golfer.Dec 2, 2019
What is a double bogey called?
An eagle is 2-under par on a hole. A double bogey is 2-over par on a hole. A double eagle (very rare) is 3-under par (also called an "albatross").May 24, 2019
Best golf jokes: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Four retired men play golf together once a week for many years. One day a funeral procession drives by the course. One man says to the others: “Stop and remove your hats, gentlemen. Show some respect.”
Best golf jokes: Caddiesmack
A golfer walks off the 18th green, hands his putter to his caddie and says, “Kid, you’ve got to be the worst caddie in the world.”
Best golf jokes: Clucking mad
A golfer sliced a ball into a field of chickens, striking one of the hens and killing it instantly. He was understandably upset, and sought out the farmer. “I’m sorry,” he said, “my terrible tee shot hit one of your hens and killed it. Can I replace the hen?”
Best golf jokes: Speed bump
A fourball watched, intrigued, as a lone player played up short of the green they were on. As they teed off on the next they noticed him quickly chip on and putt out, before running up to their tee.
Best golf jokes: Swing thoughts
Guy gets to a long par 3 over water. A voice from above says, “Hit the new Titleist Pro V1.”
Best golf jokes: Second coming
A man was addressing the ball when an announcement came over the loud speaker: “Will the gentleman on hole number one please not hit from the ladies’ tee box.”
Best golf jokes: Cheat on me
An American citizen is vacationing on his own in Ireland. He decides to play a round and is paired with three locals.
What are some good golf jokes?
2. “An American went to Scotland and played golf with a newly acquainted Scottish golfer. After a bad tee shot, he played a “Mulligan” which was an extremely good one.
What is a practice tee?
82. “Practice Tee: A place where golfers go to convert a nasty hook into a wicked slice.”. Most golfers don’t actually get better, even if they have regular practice because most don’t practice with purpose. Click here to read our best practice drills so you can actually improve when hitting golf balls.
How many times did a golfer try to hit a golf ball over the inlet of water between him and
A golfer tried three straight times to hit a golf ball over the inlet of water between him and the green. But each time the ball splashes into the drink. In utter frustration the golfer said, “Caddie, take my clubs on in, I’m going to jump into the water and drown myself.”. The caddie replied, “I doubt that, sir.
What do black bear droppings smell like?
Grizzly bear droppings have small bells, golf-gloves, sunglasses and other similar golf items in them and they usually smell like pepper spray. Two women were playing golf.
Short Golf Jokes To Tell On The Golf Course
If you’re a golfer, you’ll want to share these jokes with your golfing buddies on social media:
Golf Puns And One-Liners
Here are some funny golf jokes to tell the next time you’re on the golf course:
Long Golf Jokes To Tell During A Round Of Golf
Here are some hilarious golf jokes about how hard it is to do well when you’re playing golf:
More Long Golf Jokes
Here are some more hilarious golf jokes that will make you laugh out loud: